Controversial Questions About Islam & Comments

Prepared by: Dr. Saeed Ismaeel Sini

What about Marriage and Divorce?

… In general, a woman is married through her guardian, but there are exceptions. This is because, in Islam, her father, her brother, or her son takes care of her before marriage, including all her living expenses. If the marriage fails, she goes back to her guardian’s care. Furthermore, if the divorced husband fails to pay for his children, the burden goes back to her guardian too. However, there are scholars who permit a woman to marry without a male guardian, in certain cases.

     Divorce is in the hand of the man because the man is the one, who normally proposes marriage, pays the marriage expenses, including gifts for his wife and the wedding feast. The woman receives a dowry, which ranges from a symbolic amount to thousands of US dollars or Euros. On the top of that, the husband should provide her with decent living conditions, including clothing, housing, and medical expenses. And if marriage fails, he has to pay for his children’s support, which includes their educational expenses. In addition to that, the more emotional person is the less thoughtful and sensitive to the end results of a wrong decision, whether it is the marriage or the divorce.

     Furthermore, the man of the house is like the government in a country and held responsible for the misconduct of his household. Therefore, Islam has given him the authority and means to discipline family members who go astray and endanger the peace of the house. Among these means is, as the last resort, some types of physical punishment, but not a slap on the face or grievous bodily harm, which would cause humiliation and resentment and contradicts the mutual love and care that naturally exist between married couples and their children.

     In the light of all these facts, the husband usually looks at divorce more seriously than the wife, especially if he is aware that divorce is the most hateful act to Allah among the permissible things.[1]

     On the other hand, a wife can acquire divorce through the courts, if necessary, and would keep the dowry for her husband’s failure to fulfill his essential duties, if that is the verdict. She can also buy her way out by paying back her dowry or, sometimes, by paying part of the marriage expenses too.

[1] Abu Dawood: Divorce

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